While talking to one of my patients about coping with his anger it dawned on me that many
people are going about this the wrong way. I myself am guilty!
For the most part I have personally been teaching my children temporary coping. You know
the coping skills that we can all list off the top of our head-- walking away from situations,
prayer, journaling, deep breathes, count to 10 and etc. However these are temporary and for the moment coping tools.
In the past I have found myself becoming annoyed with those who've said they have tried
these but none work. But truth is they did what they were supposed to do but that kid just
needed something more. They needed some longer coping strategies to back up those
temporary ones. There is only so much breathing you can do when you and your family are
in constant conflict.
So what are some long term coping strategies. That's the thing there is no list. In order to
find a long term solution that person has to search who thing themselves to find out what is going to make them happy. What does this person like to do?What will make them happier
overall? For some this may mean confronting that one thing that they have tried to avoid
and put away with breathing, counting, and small hobbies. So as I move forward in my
therapy practices I have a new attitude about coping and what it means for the kids I work
with and even myself!
